If you want to write more concisely—to stay within task page limits or to keep your message clear—consider these tips:
Get active. Where possible, try using the active voice, rather than the passive one. Look for “is” and “was” as signs of the passive voice.
Instead of The approach will be determined by the results of… (3 words)
Try The results of… will determine the approach (3 words)
Make every word count. Ensure that the purpose and meaning of every word is clear. Modifiers are often redundant (like free gift or true fact), which can create confusion. Intensifiers like “very” and “extremely” rarely add to the reader’s understanding.
Instead of: A contributing factor to the record high new development… (9 words)
Try: A factor of the record development… (6 words)
Or: Contributing to the development… (4 words)
Use one word instead of many. Look for opportunities to replace phrases with one or two words:
Instead of one at a time, try individually
Instead of all at once, try together
Instead of at this time, try now
Instead of because of the fact that, try because
Putting it together
Consider this example:
The high fluctuation in the cost of the widgets is exceeding the low threshold of risk tolerance of the unit.
(20 words)
Issue 1: Is exceeding could become exceeds to keep the statement active
Issue 2: Does high refer to the cost changing frequently or by a large amount? Solution: decide if the frequency or amount of change matter? If so, clarify. If not, delete high.
Issue 3: Threshold and risk tolerance are redundant in this sentence. Solution: Delete one.
Rewritten, the sentence becomes:
The fluctuating cost of the widgets exceeds the unit’s risk tolerance.
(11 words)